I’m on a quest to figure out love. I’m hilarious, right? I have no idea really where to go with this post. I was shown a video about vulnerability, and it rocked me.
Crazy, right? I posed questions via social media about vulnerability just like Brené did, and I got some really great answers. It’s quite fascinating. Many people “liked” my post in which I posed the questions, “How would you define vulnerability? What makes you feel vulnerable?” I was surprised with the amount of likes and the lack of actual answers.
One answer consisted of “weakness” and another “strength.”
My high school Scripture teacher who I adore answered,
Vulnerability is the prerequisite for courage. Courage is not the absence of fear. It is the willingness to face the potential for death to one way of life so that another may arise.
A former co-worker replied,
Being in love. I feel like that’s the ultimate vulnerability.
My dear friend Rob said something along the lines of
Vulnerability is the condition of being ABLE to be affected by something.
OK, those all sound fine to me, but nothing really quite fit for me except for Brené Brown talking about vulnerability being the foundation of sorts for all things good and bad. I can deal with that for now.
I got to thinking though about love, and how it stems from vulnerability. Sort of a 1 2 punch, if you will. Being vulnerable to love will allow you to feel love and be loved, theoretically.
DISCLAIMER! I am NOT only talking about romantic love here. This is a quest for all types of love. Without trying to make this sound like a pity party, I’m not sure I’ve ever felt love. My family isn’t a family that says the word “love” to each other. Any sort of relationship has gone to the wayside and love was never mentioned. I have had moments where I think I felt love, but retrospectively I can’t say I was right in saying or receiving the words, “I love you.”
I’m on my quest for love. Here is a journal entry I wrote about love about a month ago, when my mind started to race.“Love is fucked up. Well, let me rephrase that. Love has the potential to be fucked up. There are occurrences of love wherever we may end up strolling throughout the day. It’s an all-encompassing consumption. It takes you to the highest of highs and the lowest of lows. How do you know what love feels like? Is it the way your significant other holds you? Is it a smile from a stranger? Does it happen when you’re dancing around and totally IN the moment?”
The above is potentially bullshit.
I’m seeking the impossible. I’m chasing the non-existent. I’m climbing a never-ending mountain. I want to know what love is.
I polled my friends again with “How would you, personally, define love? What people, places, things or experiences assist in you feeling love?”
I got back some more interesting answers. One replied with Haddaway’s “What is Love.” What a joke.
Other replies that stood out for me include:
Love: liking someone to an irrational extreme. When you love someone, you love them all the time. But you may not like them all the time.
Love is eternal hope.
When you’re in love, you know
“You know.” That’s what I’m trying to figure out! How do I KNOW?!
Love is an involuntary emotional reaction based on things such as desire, attraction, proximity, and possibly other sensory stimulants. It’s awesome. It’s awful. It’s an elusive commodity. And apparently we require it to function.
So, I’ll wrap it up with this. I am on a quest for love. Any kind of love. Maybe it’s the Carrie Bradshaw definition of love.
Maybe it’s figuring out how I give love? Or how I receive love? I may spend my whole life trying to figure this out, but I will keep trying.
P.S. Take a stab at my questions on love.
“How would you, personally, define love? What people, places, things or experiences assist in you feeling love?”
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